Advice for new parents of twins

Here are a few things we've found have helped us cope with day to day life with twin babies that we hope will help our friends (and others) who are expectant mums of twins. I've written it assuming you're planning to initially breastfeed, as that's what I've been doing. 

·         Before they're born, if you have any freezer space, make as many meals in advance as you can - you'll find you don't have a lot of time or energy to cook once they're born.

·         If you have space, set up changing stations upstairs and downstairs with everything you need - it'll save a lot of time. Make sure you also keep full changes of clothes there (you'll need these quite a bit) and we also found it useful having a small laundry basket for dirties.

·         Double prams can be very expensive. To save money, I use a single pram and a baby in a front carrier. It also makes it a little easier to manoeuvre, with less width.

·         Keep two muslin cloths handy in each room of the house - it's amazing how often you need them and how easy it is to mislay one at a crucial moment.

·         If your babies are small (5-6lb), you'll need to use micro (size 0) nappies, as the newborn sizes are huge on them. We found it hard to get hold of them and were only able to find them in a large Tesco store (no success at Morrisons or Sainsburys), so we decided to bulk buy to avoid having to keep going shopping for them (you'll find you get through a whole load of nappies). With our first child (now a toddler), I was constantly stressing about him getting nappy rash if I didn't change his nappy really often. This time around, it doesn't seem as pressing, and so we only change immediately if it smells like a poo or feels damp and very full - no problems with nappy rash yet, and lots of time saved.

·         Make sure you are well set up before starting a feed, as it'll be hard to move once you begin, especially if tandem feeding. I use a sports drink bottle that I can open with one hand and fill it up before I sit down. Also, having a muslin nearby, the TV remote and the phone close at hand will save lots of stress.

·         I had a problem with engorgement - breasts feeling very hard and lumpy, with milk flowing out quite quickly. If you get engorged, you must deal with it quickly to prevent getting blocked ducts/mastitis which can make it painful to feed them and being very full can also make it hard for them to latch on. Before each feed, I used a hot water bottle on top of the breast, whilst expressing a few ml with a hand pump and this cleared it up quickly.

·         If your babies are small and premature, which they most probably will be (mine were 4lb 13oz & 5lb 4oz), they may not feed for too long and be quite sleepy. It may seem a bonus that you get to catch up on more sleep between feeds, but if they're not gaining weight well (and to help avoid having to later do annoying top up feeds), you must make sure they are feeding every 3 hours or less. For me, this involved setting an alarm through the night and waking them when necessary.

·         Try to get tandem feeds going in the night as soon as possible. It is a bit of a killer having to get up to feed just one hungry baby, but feeding two at staggered intervals gives you only a small window of sleep time, so getting them to feed at the same time gives you more time to sleep and in bigger chunks. I use two pillows with a double rugby hold. When the first one wakes (or every 3 hours initially), I wake the other one and set up for a feed. It doesn't always work out if one is too sleepy, but it's definitely worth a try with both.

·         If you do need to give them top up feeds (I had to express milk after each feed, then give it to each of them in a cup after they'd finished), it can be really hard work, with all the expressing, sterilising and warming milk. In the night, I'd suggest taking your previously expressed milk up with you in a cool bag with freezer block and also a thermos flask of boiling water to warm the milk, so you don't have to keep running downstairs in the night.

·         Don't get upset if you have to leave one baby crying for a few minutes to deal with the other one - as long as they are in a safe place, they'll be fine for a little longer.

·         Don't get too concerned about weight gain. The midwives go on and on about it, and it can be quite stressful when it comes to frequent weighing in times (we had to do it every 2 days until they reached their birth weights), but actually, as long as they're feeding reasonably well and weeing/pooing frequently, although slow to start, the weight gain should pick up. Note: My boy twin only did a poo every other day which I was concerned about, but the health visitor seemed to think it wasn't too out of the ordinary.

·         Don't feel like you have to bath them all the time. Being small babies they'll get cold very quickly and waste lots of energy screaming and flailing around. We only bathed them once in the first month and they don't smell - they're being wiped with cotton wool and water quite a bit anyway, so don't need frequent baths too.

·         Accept all the help that is offered to you, whether it's housework, making meals, watching the babies while you shower etc, or helping look after any older siblings. It's also worth asking your Health Visitor if there are any charity schemes in place to help a new mum of twins - we're having a volunteer visit for one morning a week to help look after the babies and their older brother so I can get a few things done around the house.

·         Going food shopping with your new twin babies can be a tad frustrating - people everywhere will stop you to ask the same questions. You want to be polite and answer them, but if the babies are screaming for a feed, you'll just want to get out of there as quickly as you can. I find that answering all of the anticipated questions in a sentence or two before they have the chance to ask them speeds things up and leaves people without anything else to say. For example, stranger: "what cute babies", me: "thanks, they are twins, 6 weeks old, a boy and girl, called Jory and Tahlia; quite a handful".  

·         Enjoy cuddles, photo moments and all the attention that goes with being a mother of twins. The nights (and usually days, too) will be hard, but remember, it will definitely get easier, but they'll only be small once, so it's not worth wishing the time away.

Our Summer Holiday in Kent - Part 2

Here's the second half of our wonderful week in Kent. We arose early on the Tuesday morning for a wander around the surroundings of our cottage in Sandwich. The streets were narrow with some very old looking buildings, most of which increasingly jutted out with each storey. 

Strolling through the poky streets

Walking on the wall beside the river Stour

An interesting find - someone had obviously run out of ideas

Then we headed to Dover once again, this time to visit Dover Castle, a 'must-see' attraction in the area. It was a great place to visit for Zachary, as there were so many things to touch and look at.

Walking up towards the castle ahead

A grinning competition near the top of the castle

The network of underground tunnels was a highlight for all of us

The Lion of Dobson

Couldn't get him away from the stained glass reflections

Stairs are a toddler's best friend

A crowd of Japanese tourists took a liking to Zachary...

A typical kitchen of the time. Fortunately everything was stuck down and the eggs were fake.

Fillet of a fenny snake...

Stunning views over Dover and beyond

The following day, the morning was spent at Walmer Castle, near Deal. The grounds were as beautiful as the weather that day. They also had an interesting vegetable garden. The house was interesting to look around, although Zachary once managed to climb underneath the ropes of a cordoned off area which turned out to be alarmed!

Lily pond

Pretty in pink

Giddyup, Daddy!

BOOM!

That afternoon we drove to Ramsgate and enjoyed a stroll alongside the harbour, then a tour around the home of the famous architect, Augustus Pugin.

It was tempting to go for a dip

Pugin's home

Pugin's cloister design

Pugin's vibrant wallpaper - not to everyone's taste

Here's Swith enjoying some waffles topped with ice cream and various sauces for tea, yum!

So good, it melts in your mouth

The next day involved trekking through the oddly bleak landscape of Dungeness. This consists of several non-matching and odd looking houses, a couple of lighthouses and a whole load of abandoned boats/fishing equipment, all dominated by a huge imposing nuclear power station with hundreds of pylons.

NEVER ask Swith about the mishap with the sign

Walking along a shale beach in the sweltering heat

Packed lunch by the sea

The power station has put this up to test for radiation leaks

Tonnes of abandoned boats and equipment to explore behind

Up the winding stairs of the lighthouse

Two aliens made an appearance

Zachary had fun constantly running around the top of the lighthouse

That afternoon we drove to the lovely town of Hythe to visit the church and crypt of St Leonard. This was no ordinary crypt, it holds the largest and best preserved collection of bones and skulls in Britain, with bones from an estimated 2000 people. It is thought to originate from the 13th century, when the church was extended eastwards which required the uncovering thousands of graves. Many of the people are thought to be of Roman descent. It was interesting to look at some of the injured and diseased skulls and bones, including one with a dagger through the head, another which had been sliced by a sword in the back of the neck as well as various bone abnormalities.

Disappointment when we thought the crypt was closed

Skulls a plenty

10% of the skulls are children

Dead to the world

We then had a lovely stroll through the cemetery for great views over Hythe

Our final day on holiday involved gradually driving home whilst stopping off to visit places on the way. The main stop-off was at Hever Castle and Gardens which was the childhood home of Anne Boleyn. We had a wonderful time roaming the absolutely stunning gardens (especially beautiful in the glorious sunshine) and the castle was great too, with lots of history and even a torture chamber!

We ate our lunch here

The shade was lovely

A great feature for kids - the water maze, in which water spurted upwards when you triggered a trap; Zachary wasn't too sure

The castle itself

Topiary in the form of giant chess pieces

We headed home after yet another wonderful (but tiring!) holiday. We'd recommend Sandwich as a great location to stay as there is such an array of different places of interest to visit. Bring on next year's holiday!

Our Summer Holiday in Kent - Part 1

Haven't had a chance to blog about this yet, but here's a little snapshot of the first half of our holiday in Kent, back in July. 

It's a good five hours to Kent, so we had the obligatory stop at a playground on the way, in Andover...

"I want to go on that one next!"

Zachary spent a long time counting on the abacus

Our next stop was at Rochester, to visit the beautiful Rochester Cathedral and Castle. Zachary had a fantastic time in the Cathedral, running up and down, playing with chair covers and attempting to climb on things he wasn't supposed to. The weather was a little murky, but the rest of the week was largely very sunny, so we had little to complain about. 

Rochester Cathedral (taken from Rochester Castle)

Zachary sneaks into the sanctuary

The cloisters and a well-kept garden

Rochester Castle; we were slowed down by the large number of puddles that needed jumping in

Zachary loves steps, and this castle had steps-a-plenty

After stopping for fish and chips in Ramsgate for our tea, we finally made it to the historic town of Sandwich. The cottage in which we stayed was old and had a lot of character - even the floors weren't level!

The cosy lounge where Zachary enjoyed the luxury of watching cartoons on Sky

Mummy and Daddy's luxurious super king size bed - so large they could spread out and not touch one another!

Here's the goodie pack the owners kindly left for us - yum!

The following day we headed to Margate to meet Uncle Caleb and Auntie Bev. The first stop was the Shell Grotto, a hidden network of underground passages lined with ornate shell mosaics, which had the feel of a temple. Discovered in the 19th century, this marvel is unknown in its purpose, origins or date (even century) of construction. Zachary enjoyed running through the narrow corridors, being chased by his adult attendants.

Producing a work of modern art

A gathering in the final cavern

"You can't catch me!"

We later enjoyed a tour of Margate, hosted by Auntie Bev who grew up there and showed us places where she used to live and various other interesting features.

We visited a Tudor House with dark rooms and low ceilings

After a trip to the playground and beach in Broadstairs, we visited Crampton Tower Museum, an interestingly shaped railway museum with little trains that moved around when you pressed some buttons (Zachary's favourite). The beehive building was an interesting experiment in sound - if you stood in the exact centre and spoke, the sound resonated back towards you, making your voice sound amplified. We climbed the tower for more railway history and train models.

Watching the trains move when he pressed

He soon get distracted and went to play with a chain instead

The oddly shaped beehive building and tower behind

The following morning's breakfast was a delight of waffles, bacon (from the welcome pack) and honey (an excellent stand-in for maple syrup).

Tasty

We drove to Canterbury for a glimpse of the Cathedral and a wander around the City Centre.

To prevent him dashing between the many legs, we put Zachary safely in his buggy

At the gate of Canterbury Cathedral

This is the most you can see without paying an extortionate price

We stopped for lunch at St Martin's Church, the oldest church in continuous use in England

After lunch, we drove west to Faversham for Belmont House and Gardens, for a lovely walk in the sunshine around the stunning gardens, followed by a tour of the largest privately owned clock collection in the UK.

Put it back, Zachary!

Zachary loves smelling flowers

Always there at the drop of a hat

Just pretty

Cuddles in the nice cool shade

Belmont House - the front is tiles, not bricks

We had dinner at Pizza Express, although Zachary was a little bored waiting and kept throwing things onto the floor. We treated him to his own portion of dough balls.

He decided he only liked the insides of the dough balls

The next day we headed to Dover for a walk along the coast to see the white cliffs and visit a National Trust lighthouse.

Zachary liked watching the trucks at the docks

The White Cliffs of Dover

We finally made it to the lighthouse for a tour

Keep a lookout for next week's post with part two!